Cherry picked from years and years of playing swigs and gigs:
(preemptive strike: this whole "bringing (xxxx) back" construction needs to be destructed immediately before ESPN gets their hands on it and ruins football highlights for the 2006-07 season. And yes, Miss Timberlake, I blame you.)
1. The kid wearing an angora sweater, blocky glasses, and orthodox Converse is actually trying really, really hard. He didn't just fall into those clothes, as he'd like you to believe.
2. That same kid and his layabout douchebag friends will clog space at the bar nursing their 5 dollar PBRs and shoot vacant, prissy looks at anyone who cheers for you too loudly. They will then go home and listen to something they believe they esteem but aren't sure why. Also, the girl in the MC5 t-shirt is a cold, dead fish.
3. Booking agents are never, ever, ever, ever, ever happy to hear from you. But God love 'em.
4. Open with the easiest possible song in your catalogue. Nothing picked, arpeggiated; no breaks, no stops and starts. Follow that with the fastest thing you own.
5. You'll scarcely believe how rude and disrespectful that goodfellow with the acoustic guitar and terrible voice can be until he talks through your entire set. And then you'll know.
6. The ones who keep coming back, those are the ones you're playing for. Also play for the kid who should have won the Pinewood Derby in 1989. He's out there somewhere and needs a good song every now and again.
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5 comments:
I am that kid. My car was big on flash, low on function. Thanks a lot dad.
my dad built the best one in 83, it was in 84 when i built mine that it went to shit.
I don't know that I should have won, but I know those fuckers who cheated with mercury tubes inside the cars should not have. The knife my dad gave me to carve those things went on to carve a lot of driftwood sculpture, though, whereas I'm confident the cheating fuckwads got nothing more than a more-ingrained sense of entitlement out of the whole thing.
So are audiences any different/better/worse in your new (well, a few years new) area?
man, my car was always a block of wood with poorly attached wheels. it's not like my dad had earned a living making wood furniture for years or anything though... wait a minute...
i havent played much, charlz, but they're a little better for sure, in ways. lower-key feeling (to the good), but maybe that's a function of age (mine and most of the audience/friends).
there are probably just as many kids here who are too cool for school, and i've never wanted to punch someone in the face as much as i did this smarmy, suckass, talentless guy who talked through my entire show after i'd gone and seen his (AWFUL) two days prior, but that said, it's better here for sure.
i love that this engendered more pinewood talk. awesome. keep it up.
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